The study of the relationship between personal attitudes, the level of self-actualization and satisfaction with marriage in married couples.

Studies on couple satisfaction with marriage have been and remain relevant at all times. The growth of conflicts in a significant part of families, misunderstanding, an unfavorable atmosphere in the family negatively affects not only the psychological state of the spouses, but also the children. Most often, unfavorable tendencies of dysfunctional relationships in the family are associated with socio–economic conditions ^{[3, 5]}. The number of dysfunctional families is increasing, in which alcoholism, drug use, aggression lead to a violation of communication, unsatisfied needs of partners in respect, love, recognition. Emotional and personal disorders, tension, loss of feelings of love and security are increasing, violations of personal growth and identity formation are observed ^{[1, 2, 4]}. In this regard, there is a need to study the satisfaction with marriage in the family and the factors that contribute to the development of harmonious / disharmonious relations in a married couple.

In psychology, research devoted to the study of marital and intra-family relations is traditional. A.N. Volkova, A.K. Dmitrenko, T.V. Galkina, D.V. Olshansky, A.P. Oschepkova, B.M. Petukhov, K. Vitek, D. Myers, etc. show interest in the problem of marital compatibility in terms of personal characteristics, as well as role and value orientations.. A large block of works is devoted to the problem of spouses' orientations in the sphere of family roles (N.N. Obozov, N.F. Fedotova, V.V. Matina, E.V. Antonyuk, etc.). Yu.E. Alyoshina, A.N. Volkova, T.M. Mishina, T.A. Gurko and others point out the need to take into account the changes occurring in the family at different stages of its life in studies.

These studies combine the authors' attempts to identify and analyze the factors affecting marital satisfaction with marriage, as well as consideration of changes in marital relations in the process of family development. Most authors recognize the leading role of personal, socially conditioned characteristics of spouses in assessing the success of marriage and the overall health of the family. The role of the degree of satisfaction of one's own needs and self-expression is also noted ^{[6, 7]}.

The purpose of this study is to identify the relationship between personal attitudes, the level of self-actualization and satisfaction with marriage in married couples. The object of the study is marital relations. The subject of the study is the factors affecting the satisfaction of spouses with marriage.

The following methods were used in the study: "Marriage Satisfaction Test Questionnaire" (OUB). Authors: V.V. Stolina, T.L. Romanova, G.P. Butenko; test "Measuring attitudes in a married couple". Authors: Alyoshina Yu.E., Gozman L.Ya., Dubovskaya E.M.; Self-actualization test (SAT), measuring self-actualization on two basic and a number of additional scales (author: Alyoshina Yu.E, etc.).

The reliability of the study was ensured by the initial methodological analysis of the theoretical provisions of psychology; the use of a set of diagnostic methods adequate to the purpose and objectives of the study in compliance with the requirements for their validity and reliability; approbation of the work; the use of mathematical and static data processing procedures.

The study was conducted on the basis of the "Center for Psychological Support and Health Development" in Krasnoyarsk.

The study involved 20 married couples with a marriage experience of 7-10 years. All families except 3 have children aged 7 to 9 years. 10 families with 2 children and 7 families have one child, 3 couples do not have children. The average age of men is 35 years, women - 34 years. The age difference, for most couples, is from 1 to 5 years.

The educational level is about the same. In 16 families, the husband has a higher education. In 18 families, the wife has a higher education, in 2 families both the husband and wife have a secondary special education, in 2 families the husband has a secondary special education.

The study was conducted in the form of written answers to test questions. All couples willingly made contact, none of the selected couples refused to participate in the study, many were interested in their research results. The survey was preceded by an introductory conversation, in which the objectives of the study were noted, the procedure for filling out the questionnaire and methods, as well as the issue of confidentiality of this study was discussed.

At the first stage, we conducted a diagnosis of marital satisfaction with married couples using the Marriage satisfaction questionnaire test (OUB) by V.V. Stolina, T.L. Romanova and G.P. Butenko. The test results are shown in Figure 1.

According to the diagnostic data, it turned out that there are no couples among the subjects whose marriage is absolutely dysfunctional, as well as absolutely prosperous. 1 couple finds their marriage prosperous, 5 couples have a rather prosperous marriage, in 1 couple the spouse finds the marriage prosperous, but the spouse sees some disadvantages in it, however, in general, the results of satisfaction with marriage are quite high. Also, 2 couples are in a transitional state, i.e. they find their marriage equally prosperous and dysfunctional. In five couples, if the wife has equal claims to the marriage and finds its shortcomings, the husbands find it quite prosperous. Low results were obtained in three couples, where one of the spouses finds the marriage rather dysfunctional, and the other half considers it dysfunctional in general (Fig. 1).

Fig.1. Combinations of diagnostic results of marriage satisfaction in couples

Thus, it can be concluded that 35% of the subjects are generally satisfied with the marriage, and 15% are in an unsuccessful marriage, where everyone has claims to their second half and to the family way of life in general.

Comparing the diagnostic results between a group of men and a group of women, you can see that men are more satisfied with their marriage than their second halves. So men have an average diagnostic score of 29.05, and the female half – 27.2 (Fig. 2).

Fig. 2. Average diagnostic score of marriage satisfaction in the group of men and in the group of women

So women "lead" in terms of significant dissatisfaction with marriage (husband – 0, wife – 3), and men – in terms of "satisfaction rather than dissatisfaction" (husband – 9, wife – 6) (Fig. 3).

Fig. 3. Diagnostic results of marriage satisfaction in the group of men and in the group of women

To test the hypothesis that men are more satisfied with marriage than women, we use the Mann-Whitney U-test. This criterion is intended to assess the differences between two samples by the level of any feature quantified.

To calculate the value of the Mann-Whitney U-test, we introduce rank values for test results (Table 1).

Table 1 Data for the calculation of the criterion U-Mann-Whitney criterion

The sum of the ranks coincides with the calculated one: 464+356=20*(20+1)/2=820, therefore, all calculations are done correctly.

Ucr for the level of statistical significance p?0.05 is 138 and for p?0.01 Ucr =114.

Thus, Uemp< Ucp, which indicates that the group of men exceeds the group of women in terms of satisfaction with marriage with 99% confidence.

We also tested the correlation between the degree of satisfaction with the marriage of the spouse and the spouse. For this purpose, we used the Pearson correlation coefficient. It allows you to determine the strength and direction of the correlation between two features.

The Pearson coefficient was calculated in the Excel spreadsheet editor using the Pearson function. The correlation result was r=0.71. Considering that the critical values of the Pearson correlation coefficient for n=20 are 0.44 for a?0.05 and 0.56 for a?0.01, we see that there is a correlation between the two studied features.

Thus, the data of the first diagnosis indicate that men make fewer claims to their significant other, are more satisfied with family life, but there is a connection between the satisfaction of both parties with marriage: the more satisfied one side is, the more satisfied the other is with marriage.

At the next stage, we carried out diagnostics of personal attitudes in married couples. The test results are shown in Figure 4.

Fig. 4. Results of diagnostics of personal attitudes in the group of men and in the group of women

The columns in Figure 4 correspond to the diagnostic scales:

1 scale – Positive attitude towards people ;

2 scale – An alternative between a sense of duty and a sense of pleasure (increasing the result towards debt);

3 scale – Positive attitude towards children;

4 scale – Orientation to joint activity of spouses;

5 scale – Negative attitude to divorce;

6 scale – A positive attitude to romantic love;

7 scale – The importance of the sexual sphere in family life (the higher the score, the lower the significance);

8 scale – Spouses' ideas about the taboo of sexual topics;

9 scale – Orientation to the modern idea of the role of women;

10 scale – An idea of the importance of material values in a person's life.

Comparing the diagnostic results between a group of men and a group of women, we see that women are more positive about people, more responsible, more likely to make a choice towards a sense of duty. Women appreciate the importance of children in the family more than men, strive for joint activities with their spouse, try to have common interests and hobbies, without which, in their opinion, a prosperous and happy family life is impossible. They try to avoid divorce by any means, for them the romantic side of the relationship is very important. Women are more thrifty. However, the topic of sex is more closed for them than for men. For men, sexual life in marriage is very important. Men prefer pleasures, do not like obligations, do not concentrate on material values. The female position in the family is seen as traditional, but women regard themselves as modern women who seek to create not only a cozy home and a strong family, but also a self-realized career plan (Fig. 4).

We also conducted a study of the relationship between the personal attitudes of spouses: do the personal attitudes of one spouse affect the personal attitudes of the other? For this task, we also used the Pearson correlation coefficient. The results of the study are presented in Table 2.

Table 2 Values of the Pearson correlation coefficient for personal attitudes of spouses

Thus, we see that at critical values of the Pearson correlation coefficient for n=20 are 0.44 for a?0.05 and 0.56 for a?0.01, signs 3 and 8 have statistical significance. That is, there is a correlation between the positive or neutral attitude of spouses to children, as well as the closeness or openness of the sexual topic. This fact can be explained by the fact that usually when creating a family, it is discussed whether the spouses want to have children, whether their marriage is being built for the birth of offspring or pursues other goals. Also, the openness of the sexual topic in the family depends on whether the parties are ready to make contact. As a rule, if one side can talk about sexual topics, is always ready to listen to the other half, then over the course of family life, the other half can learn to make contact, even if she was closed to this topic.

The existence of a relationship between marital satisfaction and personal attitudes was also verified using the Pearson coefficient. The calculation results are presented in Table 3.

Table 3 The value of the Pearson correlation coefficient for personal attitudes and satisfaction with marriage

The critical values of the Pearson correlation coefficient for n=40 are 0.31 for a?0.05 and 0.40 for a?0.01.

The data in Table 3 indicate that there is a relationship between satisfaction with marriage and the desire to divorce (column 5) with a statistical significance of 95%, the attitude to romantic love (column 6) with a statistical significance of 91% and the significance of the sexual sphere of the spouses (column 7) with a statistical significance of 95%. The less the spouses want a divorce, the more negative their position towards divorce, the stronger their marriage. Also, the more positive the attitude of the spouses to romance, the manifestation of love, the more active their sexual sphere, the higher the satisfaction with marriage.

The third stage of our study was to identify the level of self-actualization in respondents using the SAT test by Yu.E. Alyoshina.

To compare the results obtained in the group of men and in the group of women, we calculated the average values for each scale and the total score (Table 4).

Table 4 Average values of self-actualization diagnostics in the group of men and in the group of women

The diagnostic data is shown in Figure 5.

Fig. 5. Average values of self-actualization scales among men and women

The column numbers in Figure 5 correspond to the scales:

1. Competence Scale in Time (Ts);

2. Support scale or "Self-reliance"(I);

3. Value Orientation Scale (SAV);

4. Behavior Flexibility Scale (Ex);

5. Self-Sensitivity Scale (Fr);

6. Spontaneity Scale (S);

7. Self-Esteem Scale (Sr);

8. Self-Acceptance Scale (Sa);

9. Scale of Ideas about human Nature (Nc);

10. Synergy Scale (Sy);

11. Aggression Acceptance Scale (A);

12. Contact Scale (C);

13. Cognitive Needs Scale (Cog);

14. The Scale Of Creativity (Sg).

Thus, it can be stated that men slightly outperform women on the "Self-reliance" scale, they are more guided by their own goals, beliefs, attitudes and principles in life, are not influenced by external forces, and are more conformal. Men are more likely than women to be guided by the values inherent in a self-actualizing personality. Also, men are able to accept their aggression, show their natural nature and not blame themselves in the future for the manifestation of these feelings. According to the diagnostic data, men are more contacts, easily find a common language with others. They show a keen interest in everything around them, are inquisitive, and strive to acquire new knowledge. Men are more creative than women.

However, women are more sensitive, they are aware of their needs and feelings, they are able to reflect. They are more spontaneous, can be themselves, easily express their feelings and emotions. Women are able to see and appreciate their virtues, to find strength in them. Women also understand human nature, are able to appreciate personal characteristics, respect a person for his qualities (Fig. 5).

The average score of the level of self-actualization in the group of men is slightly higher than in the group of women (Fig.6).

Fig. 6. The average value of the level of self-actualization in the group of men and in the group of women

To check the dependence of the level of self-actualization of a person on the degree of well-being of marriage, we sorted the data by the total score of the diagnostic result of marriage satisfaction in the family

According to the sorting data, it can be concluded that the level of self-actualization depends on the atmosphere in the family: the higher the degree of satisfaction with the marriage of both spouses, the higher the level of self-actualization of the respondent.

To verify this conclusion, we use the Pearson correlation coefficient (Table 5).

Table 5 The value of the Pearson correlation coefficient for the level of self-actualization and satisfaction with marriage

The critical values of the Pearson correlation coefficient for n=40 are 0.31 for a?0.05 and 0.40 for a?0.01.

Thus, it can be concluded that there is indeed a relationship between the degree of satisfaction with marriage and the level of self-actualization: the higher the level of self-actualization (SAT), the higher the degree of satisfaction with marriage, and vice versa, the higher the degree of satisfaction with marriage, the higher the level of self-actualization. This suggests that the atmosphere in the family can influence a person's opportunities and desire for development, the disclosure of their talents, opportunities, self-realization as a person. A self-actualizing personality can also positively influence the psychological climate in the family, such a person has fewer claims to his second half, she is satisfied with family life ^{[8, 10]}.

There is also a relationship between the degree of satisfaction with marriage and individual scales of self-actualization. So this relationship is found on the scales of competence in time, self-reliance, value orientations, flexibility of behavior, self-esteem, self-acceptance, ideas about human nature, synergy, acceptance of aggression, contact, cognitive needs, creativity.

Thus, we can conclude that people are open, sociable, not concentrating on mistakes and insults of the past, living in the present, flexible, accepting themselves as they are, respecting and appreciating their dignity and personal characteristics of other people, striving for new knowledge and creative personalities are more prosperous in family life.

The results of the study showed that family well-being, the degree of satisfaction with marriage depend on the personal attitudes of the spouses and the level of self-actualization of the individual.

Thus, based on the results of the study, the following conclusions can be drawn:

1. Men are more satisfied with marriage than women, they make fewer claims to their significant other, they are more satisfied with family life.

2. There is a relationship between husband and wife satisfaction with marriage: the more satisfied one side is, the more satisfied the other is with marriage.

3. There is a correlation between a positive or neutral attitude towards the children of one and the other spouse (husband and wife treat children equally), and this relationship can also be traced between the attitude of spouses to the possibilities of discussing sexual topics.

4. There is a connection between satisfaction with marriage and the desire to divorce, the attitude to romantic love and the significance of the sexual sphere. The less the spouses want a divorce, the more negative their position towards divorce, the stronger their marriage. Also, the more positive the attitude of spouses to romance, the manifestation of love, the more active their sexual sphere, the higher the satisfaction with marriage.

5. The overall average score of the level of self-actualization in the group of men is slightly higher than in the group of women. This difference is so insignificant that it can be concluded that men and women are equal in their levels of self-actualization.

6. There is a relationship between the degree of satisfaction with marriage and individual scales of self-actualization. This relationship was found on the scales of competence in time, self-reliance, value orientations, flexibility of behavior, self-esteem, self-acceptance, ideas about human nature, synergy, acceptance of aggression, contact, cognitive needs, creativity ^[9].

7. People are open, sociable, not concentrating on mistakes and insults of the past, living in the present, flexible, accepting themselves as they are, respecting and appreciating their dignity and personal characteristics of other people, striving for new knowledge and creative personalities are more prosperous in family life.

8. The results of the study showed that family well-being, the degree of satisfaction with marriage depends on the personal attitudes of the spouses and the level of self-actualization of the individual.

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